I have received an Email with the top 50 programming quotes. Here are my favourites:

  • “Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.” – Rick Cook
  • “Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen.” – Edward V. Berard
  • “They don’t make bugs like Bunny anymore.” – Olav Mjelde
  • “A C program is like a fast dance on a newly waxed dance floor by people carrying razors.” – Waldi Ravens
  • I have always wished for my computer to be as easy to use as my telephone; my wish has come true because I can no longer figure out how to use my telephone.” – Bjarne Stroustrup
  • “In the one and only true way, the object-oriented version of ‘Spaghetti code’ is, of course, ‘Lasagna code’ (too many layers).” – Roberto Waltman
  • “For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless. And then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are, in short, a perfect match.” – Bill Bryson
  • “Good design adds value faster than it adds cost.” – Thomas C. Gale
  • “Perfection [in design] is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupry
  • “The best programmers are not marginally better than merely good ones. They are an order-of-magnitude better, measured by whatever standard: conceptual creativity, speed, ingenuity of design, or problem-solving ability.” – Randall E. Stross
  • “To iterate is human, to recurse divine.” – L. Peter Deutsch
  • “The trouble with programmers is that you can never tell what a programmer is doing until it’s too late.” – Seymour Cray
  • “Most good programmers do programming not because they expect to get paid or get adulation by the public, but because it is fun to program.” -Linus Torvalds

And my favourites:

  • “You can’t have great software without a great team, and most software teams behave like dysfunctional families.” – Jim McCarthy
  • “Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it.” – Donald E. Knuth
  • “Sometimes it pays to stay in bed on Monday, rather than spending the rest of the week debugging Monday’s code.” – Christopher Thompson
  • “First learn computer science and all the theory. Next develop a programming style. Then forget all that and just hack.” – George Carrette
  • “Most software today is very much like an Egyptian pyramid with millions of bricks piled on top of each other, with no structural integrity, but just done by brute force and thousands of slaves.” – Alan Kay
  • “Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live.” – Martin Golding
  • “There are two ways of constructing a software design. One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies. And the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies.” – C.A.R. Hoare

I was reading an article in the Computer Weekly magazine the other day. The article features the 10 worst inventions from apple (so far) and the 7 worse inventions from Microsoft (so far). Such articles prove one thing that has been well documented.. it takes many failures to become successful! The articles from the computer weekly magazine are the following:

I am talking of course about Stewie Griffin, the baby from Family Guy! On http://www.stewielive.com/ you can interact with him. You type in a command and he replies. I played a bit and found out he responds to the following commands (in parentheses are my comments):

  • doctor
  • simpsons (that’s naaaastyyy as Cleveland would say!)
  • meg (I know quite a few women for whom Stewie’s opinion applies perfectly!)
  • brian
  • chris
  • kill lois (of course!)
  • deuce (of course!)
  • victory is mine (or broccoli)

Moreover he responds to the following commands:

money, dance, sex, eat, sleep, poo, ass, stewie, time machine, evil twin, quagmire, tricycle, walk, scratch, baby, damn it, bitch, fat, hands, blink, nose, mouth, spit, talk, mind control, god, cow, love.

On the other hand he doesn’t seem to respond to the following commands:

herbert (I mean come on… if stewie doesn’t have a line on an old, pervert paedophile… who does?), hair, bertram, shut up, fox, easter egg, seth, MacFarlane, Quahog, imbecile, cleveland, adam, west, teeth, diaper, sewing machine, car, beat up, Rupert, swim

I recently went back home for a few days. A neighbour’s cat had given birth to four little kittens. Once I woke them up and one of them was really pissed off. I have never seen so much anger and a look of annoyance in a cat before! (S)He looks like he is saying: “why did you wake me up you*&%$?”. By the way, from another picture, it seems that this particular kitten has a mustache!